In early 2011, in the peak of some very heavy training, I ripped a piece off of my favorite training bandanna and tied it to my wrist.
I did it to remind myself of my strength whenever I felt weak. I wore that fabric during some of the most physically, mentally, and emotionally difficult times I had ever encountered in life, and I never took it off. My “band of strength” stayed with me through it all.. I told myself I would take it off when I felt I didn’t need it anymore.
As 2012 played out, I moved on to a new place in life, and I felt I didn’t need my strength as much as I once did. And ironically, at the exact same time, my bandanna began to fall apart off of my wrist…. I took it as a sign, and cut the remaining cord, and vowed to tie a new band when I felt I wanted to focus on a new theme in my life story..
Enter new band.
This band represents “individuality, unapologetically”.
While my old band was black and faded, my new one is a bright turquoise with electric green. I wore it during my kids’ first 5 hour mountain hike.. a special day for all of us.
This year has been dominated by me further finding myself as a woman. Everything I have discovered only solidified the realizations that while being myself, I am completely different than anyone else… same as it is for every person in this world.
I embrace who I am, that I have the right to be myself, and that I’m happy with it all. And the only one I will ever owe explanations to on how I live my very different life is God above.
I won’t apologize for my faith.
I won’t apologize for my past.
I won’t apologize for my hobbies.
I won’t apologize for my passions.
I won’t apologize for my thoughts.
I won’t apologize for being myself.
And when nobody understands, and the world is going in an opposite direction:
I will chart my own course and listen to the small but powerful voice inside of me. I will proudly own who I am, and why I am. And as struggles come like they always do for me and everyone, I’ll look at my wrist and remember that I can’t and won’t back down on owning up to myself and my own expectations and dreams.
I am strong.
I am a unique individual.
I am happy with who I am on the inside.
I will celebrate life.
I will live abundantly.
I will walk by faith and not sight.
And I will never, ever, apologize for being ME.
Sorry for the brief intermission! Back to training & my thoughts on Badwater…:)