Man. I have the best luck ever. Seriously…
Monday morning, after a couple hours of sleep, I woke up at 4 to run 10 miles and then up Stone Mountain. Then, I decided to be a cool mom and take my kids to the local theme park. We spent the entire day riding roller coasters, splashing around in the water park, sweating it up in the 90 some odd degree heat, and dodging skanky people and puke.. You know, just typical cheap thrill park stuff. Good times.
Later in the day, I got a call from my husband reminding me that he had signed up to play softball with the local church, and their team had a double header that night. All though I was exhausted from more than a full day, I wanted to show my support. So, I agreed to ditch the park in time to cut across Atlanta traffic and catch his games.
After an hour or so, we finally made it to the ball field. With a quick look in the rear view mirror, I realized that the long day had basically cramped my style. All of my make up was gone, and in its place was smudged mascara under my eyes, some sweat nasty filled hair, and some nice stains from toting kids all day on my ratty T-shirt….
Nice, Ash. Real cute.
I didn’t care too much about my nastiness because I was only going to the freakin’ ball field to watch some church league softball…Just maybe some other moms would be there [and various old dudes trying to be cool still while swinging a bat].
Apparently I was wrong…
Upon walking up to the field, I realized I must have missed the memo that every single person I went to high school with..and their mom.. had congregated at the church ball field to watch and play a game. People I have tried my hardest to avoid for a good 10 years, people that basically ruined my 15 year old life, people that were popular, people that weren’t, people that hated me, people that I hated- yeah they were all there.
Oh my gosh. Is this some kind of sick joke? No. Really. Is it? Because I’m not laughing if it is.
I scrambled in my backpack for something- anything- to improve my appearance before I walked any farther… sunscreen, a six flags cup, fruit bar… DANGITT! Where’s my %^^%# make up when I need it?!!! SUNGLASSES! There we go.
But wait. It’s dark out….screw it…I’m rockin these suckas like the 80’s.
I continued my awkward approach to the field, and made a beeline straight through everyone without saying a word, to reach my husband in the dugout, “Umm. Thanks for telling me there was a high school reunion tonight, honey.” I mumbled in my sweetest mad voice possible.
“How was I supposed to know? It’s the other team, and all of the girlfriends and wives. And apparently another team full of people we went to school with are on the neighboring field. Who cares, just watch the game.”
Who cares? I’m a woman! I wouldn’t care if I was wearing a full face of make up, my hair cute, and maybe some form fitting booty shorts to show off my running legs I’ve worked so friggin hard for these past 5 years!!! But other than that- NOT ME.
For reference, this is me at 15:
And.. This is me now:
“Erghh. Fine. I’ll be sitting on the bleachers.”
Y’all, seriously. I’m pretty sure there is a golden rule somewhere in the ancient book of life that addresses this phenomena: when you look your worst, you will undoubtably see the last people on earth you would want to see.
It’s just bound to happen.
But, really, like, everybody? I’ve lived in this same stupid small town almost my whole life and I have managed to stay the flip off of the radar for 10 freakin years without seeing a soul I wouldn’t want to see.
High school sucked major for me. MAJOR. Read “my very long story” up there under the header if you don’t know why, but man. Seeing all of those people just was NOT what I wanted.
Thankfully, everyone was rude to me, and all sat together hanging out probably reminiscing about the “good ole days” and I happily ignored them all in return. So, I didn’t get to have any of those awkward “Oh em gee, you’re like so still cool like 10 years later” conversations or anything, and I also didn’t get to say, “Yeah I know I look like crap right now, but it’s because I woke up while you were fast asleep, ran around a mountain and up it a couple of times, and chased my kids around a theme park all with no caffeine.. Typical day.”
But, I kind of wish I did get to say those things…
Because it would have felt good for others to know how much I’ve changed.
Even something like, “Yeah, so I used to be a chunky druggy, but now I’m out running 100 mile races in a sports bra like its my job.” –And– “So you thought it was funny that I graduated 5 months pregnant , but take a look at my freaking cute as heck kids.” would have been especially nice too.
But yeah- that crap didn’t happen.
That only happens in movies.
Instead, I just sat on the bleachers, clutching my babies, while watching my smokin’ hot husband dominate the church league softball games & thinkin to myself Screw all them. I’m so happy I’m not who I used to be. I feel good.
Change is amazing.
I’m happy I changed. I’m thankful that I grew into a strong and independent woman. And while it would be nice for others to know the full changes I made in my life, it really isn’t for anyone but myself.
But change aside, you better believe next time I hit that ball field, I will be decked the heck out in my cutest form fitting clothes, full make up, and sporting zero shades….
and you know that NOBODY will be around to see it. Hahaha.